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Joke of the Day

"In life, we should all aim to be like Italian meatballs. Well seasoned and well rounded."

"Why are sergeants so successful in physical contests? Three stripes, you rout."

"Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken."

"What's better than cheese? A cheese grater"

"How do we know God's not a woman? We're not sandwiches."

"Where can I get sweatpants that say ""ANXIETY"" on the ass?"

"*puts on white shirt* *accidentally spills coffee* *takes off shirt* *shoves shirt into coffee pot* *puts on brown shirt*"

"Why don't black pitchers throw three strikeout in a row? Because they don't believe in the KKK"

"Dad called me a cunt I always buy him socks for Xmas. I said, ""you bastard, it's the thought that counts."" I could tell by the look in his eyes he would have kicked my head in if he had legs"

"What do piggys take when they are sick? Pigicillin!"