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Joke of the Day

"Mr. Jones, did you or did you not have an affair with the victim, Diana? ""No!"" Oh really. And what's your first name? ""Indiana"" [jury gasps]"

"I accidentally spilled my bottle of rum on the floor. I was let down because I thought I'd be the one getting wasted."

"What is Chris Brown's favorite drink? Punch!"

"Belgium is a leading producer of beer, chocolate, and weapons. I picture a country full of very well-armed fat people. Another one, I mean."

"Urethra! I've done it! ...says the gynecologist after a spectacular discovery. ""I don't think that's quite right sir,"" says the patient."

"What's the difference between three dicks and a joke? Your mom can't take a joke!"

"MISSING: 5 year old LAST SEEN: Moments after I said, ""Bath time."" DESCRIPTION: Naked, sporting 20-23 Spider-Man band-aids"

"My browser history indicates true mental instability"

"What time do philosophers like to visit the shopping mall? At the Schopenhauer."

"Did you hear about child molester who plays the piano? He was fingering a minor"