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Joke of the Day

"Judas: How long are your arms? Jesus: Why? Judas: Like in a cross, how long Jesus: A what? Judas:Across. How long across."

"Why is American beer like having sex in a canoe? it's fucking close to water."

"So Trump wants to ban Muslims. But if prohibition has taught me anything it's that people will just make Muslims in their bathtubs."

"If you think politicians are the best at 'spin'... you should listen more at funerals."

"There was once a doctor who tried to prove that mainly blood was kept in bones, But alas it twas in vein."

"What do you call a three-humped camel? Pregnant."

"I took my Biology exam last Friday I was asked to name two things commonly found in cells. Apparently ""Blacks"" and ""Mexicans"" were NOT the correct answers."

"It's no coincidence the people who call the cops when parties get loud are the people who never get invited to parties."

"2 guys walk into a bar 3rd one ducks."

"""Went to watch a movie, I was wearing shorts and he swiped his finger on my leg. Later found out he wiped his booger on me"""