72587

Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the guy who killed people on the train in Germany? Seems like he wanted to be an axe-man."

"What did the recent KKK hit-and-run victim order at Starbucks? A flat white."

"Heard rumors that a coworker slept her way to a promotion. Damn, if the bosses only saw how much I sleep at my desk I'd own this place."

"I was having dinner with a snowman... The other day I was having dinner with a snowman, and he says ""Am I crazy, or does it smell like carrots in here?"""

"Do you ever feel bored on reddit, because you read everything already? I guess you could say you've reddit already"

"What's the best thing about have sex with a lady boy You can reach round and pretend its went all the way through"

"What's 18 inches and makes women SCREAM? A stillborn."

"Why do flamingos stand on one leg? Because if they didn't they'd fall over."

"What has 4308 eyes, 28957 legs, and 398503 teeth? I don't know, but if you see it, RUN!"

"[at ER] ME: my stomach hurts. DOC: have you been able to eat anything today? ME: yeah, like 75 pieces of pizza."