72548

Joke of the Day

"Queen Elizabeth's horse tested positive for morphine and a mix of other powerful drugs. Sources say the queen is in denial. She thinks someone confused her horse's urine sample with Prince Harry's."

"How to not get scolded by your parents if you want GTA V? Mom! I want to play GTA V! Giant Turtles ATTACK V!"

"Why can't you eat a wookie? Because they're too chewie!"

"Heart melting love story: Boy: My wife & 2 kids. Heart melting love story: Boy: I can't marry u. My family is totally against it. Girl: Who r they 2 stop u? Boy: My wife & 2 kids."

"Why did the hotel manager refuse to rent his rooms out to people? He needed places to hide the bodies."

"What's the difference between your mum and a roster? A rooster says cock a-doddle-do. Your mum says any cock will do."

"What's the best way to get bubblegum out of your hair? Cancer"

"My first subtweet was in the 3rd grade when I added extra glitter to Nathan's Valentine."

"I like my men like I like my laundry Clean and hung"

"""Yo momma is so ugly, I had to invent a device that allows me to converse without looking at her."" Alexander G. Bell"