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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a cross between a hippo, an elephant and a rhino? Hell if I know"

"Confucius say to quiet the herd One must shut the flock up"

"*turns on shower* *shower whispers ""eat donuts for breakfast"" & ""get drunk tonight""* Me: Wow, that's some serious water pressure"

"Q: Why is sex like math? A: You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there's no multiplying."

"Bread is just bread until you drop it on the floor. Then it's toast."

"Nothing makes you look like an alcoholic more than not knowing how you got a cut on your face."

"What is a feminists least favourite subject at school? Triggernometry."

"Today I found out how electricity was measured... I was like watt???"

"What do you call an ugly rabbit that sits on someone's forehead? Unsightly facial hare!"

"I hate when I'm cruising in my convertible, hair blowing in the wind, then realize I'm just sitting on my ride-on lawnmower. Drunk. Again."