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Joke of the Day
"I love Ebay. Sold my homing pigeon 8 times last month."
Next Joke
"What would the headline read if an average redditor were killed by a venemous spider bite? Brown Recluse Kills White Recluse"
"What do you do if an Elephant comes through your window? Swim for your life!"
"What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? She gagged."
"I asked my wife what women really want and she said attentive lovers. Or maybe it was ""a tent of lovers."" I wasn't really listening."
"When I die, I want my decaying carcass to be loaded into a giant slingshot and flung into a rich kids bouncy castle."
"Every morning when my alarm clock goes off, I think ""This is the worst thing that has EVER happened."""
"Doctor: are you sexually active? Me: why, what have you heard?"
"[BOOK CLUB] ME: So last weeks assignment was Fight Club by Chuck Palahniuk. What did everyone think? STEVE: PAUL: JANE: SARAH: MARK: DAVE:"
"My girlfriend told me to take a spider out instead of killing it. We went and had some drinks. Cool guy. Wants to be a lawyer."