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Joke of the Day
"What book is better when you read it drunk? Tequila Mockingbird."
Next Joke
 
"How many homeless people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. Homeless people don't screw in light bulbs; they screw in cardboard boxes."
"Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes... That way, when you do criticize him, you'll be a mile away AND have his shoes!"
"A man walks into a bar ... A man walks into a bar, a man walks into a bar, a man walks into a bar, but enough about me ..."
"Saudi Arabia hates Scooby Doo... But Abu Dhabi Doo!"
"What do we want?! LOW FLYING AIRPLANE NOISES! When do we want em?! NNNNEEEEOOOOOOOOWWWWWW"
"What's the difference between a cow and 911? You stop milking a cow after 14 years.."
"I don't hold grudges... my father did and I always hated him for it"
"Arent a donut and a danish the same thing? Well they are both synonym rolls!!"
"When the machines finally take over, prepare yourself for Pope Prius the First."