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Joke of the Day
"Your father is so absent... When I Google searched him it returned: Error 404 Not found."
Next Joke
"Britain will be just fine... you always lose a few Pounds after a breakup."
"Just got a text from Bill Cosby ""Netflix and pill?"""
"Sorry I said your baby looks like the anti-Christ. I meant to say she looks like her mother."
"Whats the difference between a Pygmy and an Amazon? Well, the Pygmy is a cunning runt..."
"If you want to find a cure for stupid, take a tissue sample from people who call and request songs they're already playing 50 times a day."
"Cats won't give away your position when someone knocks on the door. They hide with you, like understanding furry ninjas."
"What's the difference between ignorance and indifference? I don't know and I don't care."
"I wish Beyonce & Jay-Z would get on stage and present their baby to the world like Mufasa did in the Lion King."
"Do you ever start writing a status and half way through you're just like... nah"