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Joke of the Day

"What do Winnie the Pooh and Jack the Ripper have in common? Their middle name."

"I dreamed about drowning in an ocean made out of orange soda last night It took me a while to work out it was just a Fanta sea."

"Two blondes in a hole Two blondes fell down a hole. One said, ""It's dark in here isn't it?"" The other replied, ""I don't know; I can't see."""

"I just swapped our bed for a trampoline My wife hit the roof!"

"Want to hear a quality joke about knives? On second thought, I can't tell it. It's too edgy"

"I saw a post about Trump supporters... And I wondered why someone would need a supporter when they have such tiny fingers."

"It's a sad day today for Eminem fans. Not for any particular reason, just because their lives are generally very sad and meaningless."

"Poor kids at sandy hook... They wished for books but they just got magazines."

"I found a 1,700 yard rock the other day.... It was a real milestone."

"When I was 12 I got kidnapped. When my parents found out they snapped into action. They rented out my room."