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Joke of the Day

"i imagine having sex with bill cosby is alot like a Ronda rousey fight. it's terrifying, some poor girl ends up being unconscious, and it only lasts about 30 seconds"

"NSFW don't read if your easily offended. Why don't black people like to dream. Because the last black guy to have a dream died."

"How many Suhhh Dudes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, it's already lit fam"

"Hide a Body? What's the best place to hide a body? Page two of Google."

"I was in a tornado. It sucked."

"Him: So what are you into? Me: *thinking of the newspaper cutouts of Justin Trudeau all over my bedroom walls and ceiling* Politics."

"So I'm Calling random stores & saying ""Hey It's Michael, Screw you guys, I quit!"".... There's got to be a Michael at one of these places..."

"Santorum pulls out after repeatedly coming in number two"

"I am fairly certain that ""YOLO"" is ""Carpe Diem"" for stupid people."

"My mom keeps asking me who made a mess at the dinner table I spilled the beans"