70248
Joke of the Day
"Trail mix? You mean M&M's with obstacles."
Next Joke
"What do you get if you put 100 paralitycs in a hot tub? A vegetable soup"
"A girl walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a double entendre... so he gave it to her."
"What do you call a sudden fart? An institute."
"Uppercuts a horse. Creates the first girrafe."
"Me: My tarot cards say that you're going to be in pain soon. Him: Ha! My Magic 8 Ball said No. *hurls Magic 8 Ball at him* Him: Ouch!"
"Screech up to a yard sale. Ask if they have any haunted amulets. Yell at the dog in your backseat, ""I'm GETTING the spell reversed, Greg!"""
"Q: How many republicans does it take to raise your taxes? A: None. The democrats do that."
"Traffic cop: Just blow into this for me sir. Man in car: But that's a balloon. Traffic cop: if you just cooperate sir, it'll soon be a dog."
"I'm concentrating so hard on trying not to eat a third cupcake that I literally can't do my job"