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Joke of the Day

"Left my iPod in the Washer and Dryer... I accidentally left my iPod in the washer and dryer, and when I took it out, all of my songs with explicit lyrics had been deleted."

"If you like something, don't forget to really oversell it so it can disappoint everyone else."

"Hey sexy granny, you better call life alert Because I've fallen for you and can't get up"

"They said when pigs fly.. But the swine already flu"

"I entered a laziness competition and placed first. I got atrophy."

"What do you get when you cut an Avocado into 6.02 x 10^23 pieces? a guacaMOLE"

"I survived Sharknado, but my friends didn't... ... I miss those chums"

"What do they say about a rapper who stole a dictionary? He got a way with words."

"A recent report shows that Gangs are now using dogs instead of knives, I tried this. My toast was very hairy"

"Do you ever think about how ""Chips Ahoy"" is meant to evoke a weary ship captain finally encountering a cookie with a decent amount of chips"