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Joke of the Day

"Jewish house on Christmas You know if a house is Jewish on Christmas if there's a parking meter on the roof."

"What's the difference between a feminist and a gun? A gun only has one trigger."

"How do you know a redneck invented the tooth brush? We would have called it a teeth brush"

"Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You'd run too if your name was ""Raaawwwrgggah""."

"[Bob Dylan giving singing lessons] I'd like you to sing it again, but this time plug your nose and put these 5 marbles in your mouth."

"What does Matthew Shephard hate more than being raped, having AIDS, and being pistol whipped? Camping."

"Money was so tight last Xmas I had to sell a kidney for gifts. And this year it's getting so bad, I may even have to sell one of my own."

"If my girlfriend and I were stoners, I would propose by asking ... ...""Marriage, you wanna?"""

"Got CPR and CCR confused. Ended up playing ""Fortunate Son"" on my boombox while watching a man die."

"My last job was circumcising elephants The pay wasn't great but the tips were huge."