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Joke of the Day

"Build a man a fire, he'll be warm for a day.. Light a man on fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life."

"What's the difference between Caitlyn Jenner and two kids playing catch at the park? I actually give a shit if the kids lose their balls."

"Our dog runs away so much, I'm just going to spray paint our phone number on her side."

"Parachute joke if your parachute doesn't deploy, you have the rest of your life to fix it!"

"The Welsh are a very shy people They're really quite sheepish..."

"How many narcissists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One narcissist. The narcissist holds the lightbulb in the socket and waits for the world to revolve around him."

"They say faith can't move mountains But I've seen what it can do to skyskrapers"

"LPT: If at first you don't succeed Repost in another sub"

"[my first day hosting shopping channel] ""for those of you who love coconut, boy do we have a product for you"" [holds up a coconut]"

"I want to create a Disney channel sitcom about an irreverent Chinese kid... and name it ""That's so Wong!"""