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Joke of the Day
"""You can hide but you can't run,"" -- Mama tortoise giving the lowdown to her kids"
Next Joke
"Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed."
"What's the difference between jam and jelly? I can't jelly my cock in your ass."
"What day was Doris Day born? Doris' day."
"If they made a movie of my life it would be a lot of me looking for something to wipe my hands on."
"I lose bobby pins in my hair. Please don't ask me to babysit your kids."
"Why does a woman smile when walking down the aisle? She knows that she no longer has to give blow jobs."
"A toothless budgie will always achieve his goals Because they always succeed"
"I sleep with my grandad's WWII bayonet under my pillow. You never know when someone might break in and start filming Antiques Road Show."
"How do you find Ronald McDonald in a room full of naked clowns? The Sesame Seeds on his buns. (According to my father this is the first joke I ever told, around 5yo.)"