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Joke of the Day

"What do most men consider a gourmet restaurant? Any place without a drive-up window."

"Just wondering why Bob Marley denied shooting the deputy but thought admitting he shot the sheriff would be a-okay."

"When is the best time to go shopping? When the stores are open."

"Canada got rid of the penny. It makes no cents."

"Why are people afraid to talk to black people? Their scared they'll say something nigative"

"Have you heard about the new Italian radial tires? When they go flat they go ""wop wop wop!"""

"My youngest is being tested for the gifted program at his elementary school and my other son thinks his toothbrush is haunted."

"""30 shots of espresso NOW."" *barista's eyes widen* Whoa what do you do for a living? ""I STAY AWAKE FOR A LIVING!"" *roundhouse kicks barista*"

"It's especially on Fridays at 5 pm when I wish I could slide down the back of a brontosaurus directly into my car."

"When it comes to cooking herb-crusted fish... ...there's a thyme and a plaice."