68638

Joke of the Day

"Women my age expect a man to have his shit together by now. Time to start dating younger women."

"Due to the weather, I was able to use the words ""wet and slippery"" at work all day without anyone thinking I'm a big perv."

"Longest verb What's the longest verb in the English language? Smiles. There is a mile between the first and the last letter."

"The name is Bond. James Bond. James Melvin ""Crazy Legs"" Bond."

"Did you hear about the farmer who was a heroin addict? He had to quit in the end, because he couldn't find a needle in a haystack."

"What is a sorcerer's least favorite disease? A staff infection"

"Two gerbils....(NSFW) ...are walking down the street and come up to a gay bar. One turns to his friend and asks. >Wanna go inside and get shit faced? Lemmiwinks is your clue."

"Kelloggs is introducing a new Game of Thrones inspired breakfast cereal. Oberyn Crunch."

"I went to a feminist picnic the other day... It was great, but no one made sandwiches."

"Knock knock. Who's there? To. To who? To whom!"