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Joke of the Day

"After finishing my pint really quickly, the barman told me to calm down. I said, ""You're telling me? You just drunk my pint!"""

"Newspaper and IPAD I told my girlfriend to get me a newspaper. ""Don't be silly"", she replied. ""Borrow my iPad."" .... That spider didn't knew what f***ing hit it."

"Unfortunately Miley Cyrus broke up with her boyfriend It didn't twerk out"

"What do you buy a recently neutered cat? Spay Roses."

"My Girlfriend told me she didn't want anything for Birthday I didn't give her anything :O #ThugLife"

"Two Wrongs Don't Make a Right... But three rights make a left"

"Do you know where I can buy tickets to the Gun Show? at the Armitorium."

"I'm always caught between a rock and someone I want to throw it at."

"Question: What goes up and never comes down? Answer: Up"

"The U.S. will soon have the first first lady that was not born in the U.S. Vladimir Putin"