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Joke of the Day

"Johnny Depp is to Tim Burton what Tyler Perry is to Tyler Perry."

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"Did you hear that Oxygen and Magnesium are dating. OMg"
"Pack of polos for sale still in the wrapper Mint condition Pack of polos for sale, still in the wrapper. Mint condition"
"Who's a modern pirate for the 21st century? Neckbeard!"
"How many members of Linkin Park does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, cuz in the end it doesn't even matter!!!"
"What distance say when velocity fell on top of him? Ow, this really hertz."
"15 is the age where you either look 11 or like 25"
"So there was a fish swimming up stream and it runs into a wall... And it was like ""damn."""
"To those out there who have accused me of selling out, of abandoning my beliefs and values to climb the social ladder: uh... yeah. yes."
"Why does snoop dog need an umbrella? Fo' drizzle...."