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Joke of the Day

"Original Yo Momma? (I think, please verify) Yo mommas so fat, shes being traded on the oil futures market!"

"""did you hear the one about the grizzly who-"" dude stop ""it's just a joke man"" i know it's stupid but- *points to my date* bear with me"

"Young boy at christmas : haha I got more presents then you !! Sister replied : Haha ! At least I dont have AIDS XD"

"Jesus is all like eat my body, drink my blood and I'm all like dude, I only like you as a friend."

"My stages of drunk: 1) onstage 2) backstage 3) hostage"

"Why did Moses part his hair? To make a path for the Israelice."

"Did You Hear that Iggy Azalea Got Engaged? She's already cancelled her wedding and reception due to lack of RSVPs."

"What's green, slimy and smells like bacon? Kermit the frogs finger (shoutout to Hesher)"

"Adding ""and sh!t"" to the end of a sentence to make it sound cooler and sh!t."

"What did the Suicide Bomber think about the premature bomb Explosion ? Wow this blew up."