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Joke of the Day

"Being a DJ is tough because sometimes iTunes won't open."

"I just poured my root beer into a square cup. Now all I have is beer..."

"Q: What do you get if you cross Dracula with Sir Lancelot? A: A bite in shining armour."

"Why did the Gluteus Maximus feel bullied? He was the butt of many jokes."

"Thank God football is back on. I've been watching baseball for months and it's only the 7th inning."

"Why was Edward stuck at the Russian airport? Because he was Snowden."

"I thought eyelashes were meant to keep stuff out of my eye, but half the time if theres anything in my eye its a damn eyelash."

"Why are penguins socially awkward? Because they can't break the ice."

"I've been seeing a lot of these lately, so here is mine. I like my steak like I like my women. White and domineering."

"If Wal-Mart is lowering prices every day, why isn't anything in the store is free yet?"