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Joke of the Day

"If I ever have a daughter I am naming her Everest. That way her boyfriends can say they Mount Everest."

"Is it physically possible to be sad in rollerskates? Cause I think my cat's just being dramatic."

"They should just draw a fart on the car A/C ""recirculate"" button."

"My friend was like ""hey bring some cd's to listen to on the trip"" and I was like ""where are we going, 2001?"""

"What is a 72? A 69 with 3 people watching."

"Why do birds fly south for the winter? Because it's too far to walk"

"What does my ex and a tampon have in common? They're both stuck up cunts."

"Guinea Pig When I was five years old, my teacher asked me if I wanted to take the school guinea pig home. Seven months later, I arrived in the African republic of Guinea."

"My math text book got recalled We were told it had too many problems"

"It's not a ""junk drawer,"" it's a free-spirited drawer without expectations or limits."