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Joke of the Day

"Why is Microsoft going straight to Windows 10? Because 7.. 8.. 9"

"Dentist to parsimonious patient ""No we give no discount for empty spaces when cleaning and polishing teeth Mrs. Borde!"""

"I've been watching so much porn lately I spit on my hotdog before putting it the bun."

"Did you hear about the guy who swam the English Channel with no arms or legs? They call him... *'clever dick!'*"

"What did the grape say when the elephant stood on it? Nothing. It just let out a little wine."

"Note: September 2, 2010 will be 90210. Plan jokes accordingly."

"Instagram fail Yes, i liked the picture on instagram that you posted 153 weeks ago And no, i didn't do it on purpose..."

"After my surgery, the doctor told me I have to pee sitting down. He told me not to lift anything that weighs more than 10 pounds."

"It's hard dating a snowman... His parents will never warm up to you."

"Yo momma's privates are like Mars... It took a team of scientists decades to find moisture on it."