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Joke of the Day
"Why is Microsoft going straight to Windows 10? Because 7.. 8.. 9"
Next Joke
"Hospitality: making your guests feel like they're at home, even if you wish they were."
"I just asked my friend to come over and ""play husband"". He's gonna be pissed when he finds out we are putting together shelves from ikea."
"Pretty woman wouldn't have been as sweet of a love story if we saw all the times she sucked c**k for money weeks prior."
"The common phrase to express somethings simplicity is ""its not rocket science..."". But what do rocket scientists say to each other? ""Come on Doug, its not.....sex."""
"Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words: ""Don't pick that up, you don't know where it's been!"""
"I'm sorry I said your head looks too small to power your body."
"Why don't blacks take cruises? They ain't falling for that shit again."
"What did the Earth say to the Earthquake? Sorry...that was my fault."
"Knock knock Heisenberg Knock knock Who's there I am the one who knocks I am the one who knocks who You know exactly who I am say my name Heisenberg You're goddamn right."