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Joke of the Day
"I think I'm going to give away my old Dyson vacuum cleaner. It's just collecting dust."
Next Joke
"Which actor is resting in pieces? Alan RIPman"
"What kind of bees produce milk? Boo-bees !"
"[Heart: Tell her her eyes are windows into eternity, filled with fire... Brain: Beacons, stars in a vast darkness] Mouth: HEY GREAT EYEBALLS"
"Someone put six uneaten pastries in the trash because Satan has many forms."
"During pelvic exam: Dr.: Your cervix is very high. Me: OMG, weed affects your cervix too?!"
"Wife - I want you to take off my bra and panties. Me - Done, now what? Wife - Put some clothes on and quit wearing my underwear! Me - ..."
"With great power come great.. power bills. *- Uncle Ben, electrician.*"
"For Sale: Golden Retriever, Had for 9 months has yet to retrieve any gold. Should just bought metal detector! Unbelievable."
"don't worry, i'm not like other girls *head slowly rotates 360*"