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Joke of the Day

"I think OJ Simpson should be on Dancing with the Stars... I have a funny feeling he really knows how to cut a rug."

"Do they have any car wash in Albania? Yes. They call it ""rain"""

"Why did the man lost in the woods catch fire? He was heading west."

"My sister wanted to marry a man clever enough to make a lot of money but dumb enough to spend it on her !"

"Me: Can I pet your dog? Stranger: sure M: one more time S: uh, ok M: again S: maybe you should get your own M: pet S: we have to go M: mine"

"What's the difference between a raft guide and a large pizza? A large pizza can feed a family."

"I hate when I'm spying on someone while they're showering and they let out a huge fart. What a sicko."

"Did you hear about the kleptomaniac with no sense of humor? He took everything literally"

"[bar] CUSTOMER: Barman BARMAN: Sir? C: This beer tastes like piss [further down the bar] BEAR GRYLLS: I'll have what he's having"

"What do you call your mum who is shorter than you? A minimum."