115086

Joke of the Day

"[bar] CUSTOMER: Barman BARMAN: Sir? C: This beer tastes like piss [further down the bar] BEAR GRYLLS: I'll have what he's having"

"I used to be into necrophilia, S&M, and Bestiality... Then I realized I was beating a dead horse..."

"A magician was driving down the street and turned into a driveway"

"If a man says something in the forest, and no woman is there to hear it... ...is he still wrong?"

"The new football stadium can hold more than 66,000 fans... Sounds pretty cold and windy to me."

"The GOP debate"

"My daughter may only be one year old today, but she retrieves beer from the fridge at a fourth grade level."

"How do you make a little girl cry twice? You rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear."

"I saw some snails fighting in my driveway... They were really slugging it out."

"What Do You Call It When Someone Has a Bad Experience With Weed? Blunt trauma."