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Joke of the Day
"What's a dead baby's favorite holiday beverage? Infanticider."
Next Joke
"After much deliberation, the Cambridge University Netball Team.... ...decided not to abbreviate their name"
"Besides being curled up on the bathroom floor convinced I was dying from liver failure for a few hours, last night was fun."
"If you need a distraction from the election there is a new American reality TV series starting soon. It's called The White House. Apparently the lead actor has been given a 4 season contract."
"INTERVIEWER: ""How would you describe yourself?"" ME: ""Verbally, but I've also prepared a dance."""
"What's the difference between Ellen Pao and hitler? Hitler at least helped his people."
"So, if someone who works for the Postal Service did an AMA and answered every single question... ...does that mean OP delivered?"
"What did 0 say to 8? hey, nice belt!"
"The opposite of SpongeBob SquarePants is TowelWeave CircleShorts"
"What do you call the sweat between two rednecks having sex? Relative humidity!"