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Joke of the Day

"I figured out a way to chop onions without crying... The trick is avoiding getting emotionally attached to the onion."

"First trick or treater of the day just came round dressed as Gloria Gaynor At first I was afraid, I was petrified."

"As a gift to my girlfriend, Tola, I tattooed her name on myself in the mirror and I think that says alot"

"Two cows are standing in a barn. Cow 1: Hey, did you hear about the big outbreak of mad cow disease? Cow 2: Good thing I'm a helicopter."

"I just want one spam email that's like, ""Congratulations! You have a perfect-sized penis."""

"How many telemarkers does it take to change a light bulb? 3. One to change the bulb and two to talk about how beautiful the turns were."

"I would make a Sodium and Hydrogen joke but... The fine bros own the rights to it :("

"Statistics show that six out of seven dwarfs... ...aren't happy."

"A musician, a lumberjack, and a mathematician were in a room together... They made a log-rhythm."

"White Girl What do a white girl and a tampon have in common? They're both stuck up cunts."