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Joke of the Day

"whats that under your shirt, Louie? you wearing The Wire? you wearing a literal DVD taped to your chest for the purposes of a visual gag eh?"

"What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on him? Nothing. He just let out a little wine."

"Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem? A: Carry loaded weapons."

"Camper: Is it easy to milk a cow? Farmer: Sure it is. Any jerk can do it."

"Why is a coin factory so logical? Because it makes cents."

"I know this guy just hit the walk button, but I'm gonna hit it again b/c he looks like an idiot who can't do anything right."

"I just made my Chiropractor's day by calling him Doctor in front of his mom."

"""I made bank today."" - Inarticulate Construction Worker"

"*Sniffs* ""Spring in the air!"" ""Why should I?"" *ba dum tss*"

"What's worse than a baby stapled to a tree? A baby stapled to ten trees."