66661

Joke of the Day

"[shootout] Cop: I said fire a warning shot Me: I already did. Cop: you shot him in the face Me: warning the others that I'm a very good shot"

"They probably could have called lightbulbs, just ""bulbs"". Most people would still get it."

"Do the French play video games? Wii"

"Jackie stood quietly as her father examined her report card. ""What is this 45 in math?"" asked her father. ""I think that's the size of the class"" she said quickly!"

"The Sahara desert walks into a bar. The barman says ""long time no sea."""

"If those Amazon drones can really get to your house in 30 minutes then condoms are about to become their #1 selling item."

"What did the Nazi interrogater say to the clock that would only tick? ""Ve have vays of making you tock!"""

"""YOL9"" -cats"

"This girl on tinder was so ugly I swiped left, pay for the undo just so I can swipe left again."

"My husband's doing that cute thing again where he thinks he's right. *throws his shit out on the lawn* *makes a bonfire*"