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Joke of the Day
"I hate when people say, ""You barely touched your food"" like what do you want me to do stroke it?"
Next Joke
"When I was a kid... 'Too cool for school' meant the boiler had broken and we were all sent home."
"Did y'all know witches make only 70% of the salary warlocks make despite doing the same evil-ass magic? That's some bullshit right there!"
"What did George Washington say to his men on March 3rd Tomorrow we march forth"
"Just came across a very strange porn site....took me ages to clean it off my screen"
"How much Squidwards does it take to fix a lightbulb? zero, because none of them knows how to"
"Why do bears poop in the woods? So nobody will see their bare (bear) bottom!"
"What do a hurricane a tornado a fire and a divorce have in common? They are four ways you can lose your house!"
"The 12 Days of Christmas reads like the amazon wish list of someone tripping balls"
"At the job interview... Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in three years? Me: Sorry, I don't have 2020 vision"