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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A dino-snore."

"Knock Knock ""Knock Knock"" ""Who's there?"" ""No, Who's on first!"""

"If you want to piss off a fat person, just date their ex. They hate when someone messes with their leftovers"

"What's the turnover rate for pornstars? 100%"

"I had to break up with my French horn playing girlfriend... ...She was great, but every time we kissed she tried to put her fist in my ass."

"My brother won a prize for staying in a hospital bed for a really long time. He got a trophy."

"New evidence has been found outside the Pistorius home that completely acquits him of his girlfriend's murder. Footprints"

"People need to stop posting denigrating photo memes of animals; they have dignity and deserve respect. Oh that's Rick Santorum? Ok carry on."

"What do they call aborted fetuses in Prague? Cancelled Czechs."

"Why did they arrest Jared Fogle at 3:15? That's when the big hand touches the little hand."