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Joke of the Day
"Take my advice I'm not using it."
Next Joke
"ROMEO:But, soft! What light through yonder window breaks? ME:Well if you'd just sod off like I asked, I wouldn't have to throw lamps at you."
"Two guys on /r/Jokes walk into a bar One adds lines after the punchline, while the other doesn't. The one who never adds these extra lines kicks the one who does. Son of a b****!"
"Eve says to Adam "" this salad is so good"" Adam says to Eve ""That's the basket with my dirty clothes"""
"A man started a business in Afghanistan. He's making landmines that look like prayer mats. ""It's going well,"" he said. ""Prophets are going through the roof."""
"One thing my dogs and I have in common is that we never want me to go to work."
"Heard this one liner at work today Hey, why don't you go slip into something a little more comfortable.....like a coma!!!!!"
"Wearing Your Wedding! A: Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger? B: Yes I am, I married the wrong woman."
"I shit my pants the other day. Which is funny, because I don't remember eating them."
"I'm white, but not cage free range eggs in my quinoa-kale quiche for my gluten, lactose, and peanut free Sunday brunch white."