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Joke of the Day
"How do you catch a rabbit? Sit in a field and make carrot noises."
Next Joke
"A prostitute got a tramp stamp It said ""tips appreciated"""
"How dare you accept my apology, I wasn't really apologizing, that was a trick to get you to say that nothing was my fault"
"When I get Christmas cards with pictures of my friends' kids on them, I just draw dicks all over their faces and send them back."
"What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? The taste."
"Smoking cures ham."
"Two smut writers get together... That night there was a lot of fanfriction."
"[NSFW][REALLY NSFW] I hate pedophiles... They're fucking immature assholes"
"My husband just left town for a work trip. I didn't want him to miss out on anything so I made him a mixtape of the kids whining."
"I thought it was a compliment to tell a girl she looked like Ronda Rousey... I guess I should've left off the ""after she got kicked in the face"" part."