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Joke of the Day

"A guy I know calls women's periods ""shark week."" I asked him why, and he told me ""Beware of blood in the water. The fearsome beast will bite your head clean off, unprovoked, when you least expect it."""

Next Joke
 
"What did the tin man say after he was ran over by a steamroller? ""Curses! Foil again!"""
"Girl, you must be the cure for osteoporosis cuz I'm definitely gaining bone density."
"Lifehack: If whenever someone asks your opinion on something you say, ""Now thats-a spicy meatball!"" people will learn not to ask you things."
"I like my coffee how i like my women, Without a dick."
"Interviewer: ""What's your greatest weakness?"" Candidate: ""Honesty."" Interviewer: ""I don't think honesty is a weakness."" Candidate: ""I don't give a fuck what you think."""
"What exactly is dissassociative identity disorder? I've heard of it but don't know what it means?"
"Orion's Belt? A Waist of Space."
"Cop: License and registration please. Me: Give me a second, I'm drunk. Cop: Sir, have you been drinking? Me: No."
"Please stop telling me how poor you are via Twitter for iPhone"