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Joke of the Day

"all I wanna do is [gunshot noise] [gunshot noise] [gunshot noise] [gunshot noise] [gunshot noise] move to a safer neighborhood"

"What did the elephant say to the man? Cute, but how do you pick up peanuts with it?"

"I invented a new word! Plagiarism!"

"Lion King is my favourite movie about an innocent baby animal. Being framed for murder."

"Life would be more fun if every time we sneezed we lifted off the ground a few feet and came back down in slow motion"

"Turns out yelling ""I can see your package through those tights!"" gets you kicked out of a ballet."

"Ten out of one women is a Russian Nesting Doll"

"What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long? Polaroids."

"What did the right eye say to the left? There's something between us that smells.. *drops mic*"

"What do you call the unjust murder of someone? Out of the Blue."