63670

Joke of the Day

"A nurse found a rectal thermometer in her pocket and thought... ""Some asshole's got my pen"""

"The only reason /r/funny is funny"

"Everyone wants a white Christmas... but all Christmases matter!!!"

"How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. She just holds it in place, while the world revolves around her. * Beverly Hills ninja edit... rotates to revolves"

"Want to hear a joke? Donald Trump. Oh wait it's not funny anymore."

"I just forked over $5,000 for a reincarnation seminar I figured what the hell you only live once."

"Why do so many American tourists end up in eastern Europe? They get Hungary so they go for Turkey."

"What did one Jew say to the other Jew? Is it just me, or is this room getting really hot??"

"Mary had a little lamb... and the midwife passed out."

"People Magazine sounds like something aliens pretending to be humans would call their magazine."