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Joke of the Day

"""Knock Knock."", ""Who's there?"" I Eat Map"

"What does a Vulcan lawnmower need to function? A spock plug."

"I took a girl with microcephaly out on a date... I was hoping to get a little head."

"Have you heard about the dyslexic robber who ran into a bank? He screamed: ""Air in the hands mother stickers this is a fuck up!"""

"Melon love Two melons in a romantic relationship were discussing their feelings for each other. ""Honeydew you love me?"" asked the first. ""Yes,"" replied the second, ""but we cantaloupe."""

"What's the difference between broccoli and boogers? My son won't eat broccoli."

"My toddler just asked me ""mummy why do people think falsely attributing quotes to my preschool peers lends their bad opinions authenticity?"""

"What did Admiral Ackbar say when he saw someone unfolding a 10'x15' sheet of canvas? IT'S A TARP!!!"

"Bring a Knife on a date? When I see lovers' names carved in a tree, I don't think it's sweet. I just think it's surprising how many people bring a knife on a date."

"The only thing between me & a killing spree is the fact that I'd have to poop in front of people in prison."