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Joke of the Day

"Why do mermaids wear seashells for a bra? Because ""B"" shells would be too small!"

"Dipping your cats in blue paint and watching them chase each other is 1000x more entertaining than Avatar."

"""Y'know, I've realize something. In almost every Western cartoon there is talking animals in it."" ""Hmm, I can't really think of any."" The pig replied."

"Hey, girls who won't stop talking about how much you love sports: We get it. You want a boyfriend."

"T is for mugs"

"told my mum i wanted to get a tattoo in a disgusted manner she replied 'over my dead body!' i was like, 'well i was planning on getting it on mine, whilst breathing'"

"I bought an extension ladder from a recovering alcoholic on Craigslist... But it only has 12 Steps!"

"Do you know what Minnesota doesn't have? Super Bowl Babies."

"*buys roofies, slips then into girlfriends drink, plays video games for 8 hours straight in peace and quiet*"

"My youngest is being tested for the gifted program at his elementary school and my other son thinks his toothbrush is haunted."