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Joke of the Day

"If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?"

"Will Smith: ""Jaden, I want you to star in this 100 million dollar movie with me"" My Dad: ""Shut up and hold this flashlight Steve"""

"What is the hardest part of a vegetable? The wheelchair. ^sorry"

"Why can a number divided by zero never be found in the dictionary? Because it's undefined."

"I think I pulled a muscle avoiding my neighbor in the grocery store."

"I should have just named my dog ""Password""."

"I waited 279 days before I made my first post on Reddit, apparently I could've waited 558 days and received the same response."

"I told my ex girlfriend "" i'll never get over you"". ""i'll have to get up and go around""."

"I never wash my fruit, in case anybody's wondering how badass I am."

"""Charlie, I want a divorce."" [in a black robe sacrificing a chicken on a satanic blood alter] Why?"