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Joke of the Day

"Who is the oldest singer on the Internet? Click Jagger."

"Reddit gold is a lot like Nazi gold Accumulated over the corpses of people you've burned"

"[NSFW] MY wife walked in on me fucking my daughter... I wasn't sure if she was surprised by the fact that I was fucking my daughter, or the fact that the abortion clinic gave me the fetus..."

"Did you dream of me, baby? -Are you a swimming pool full of Lucky Charms & milk? No, silly. -Then no."

"Why is the sea salty? Because the land does not wave back."

"Common sense: Walk away. Me: No."

"I'll date any guy that can digest a seagull faster than me."

"The biggest difference between men and women is what comes to mind when the word ""facial"" is used."

"ME: What's this bit here? NURSE: ...his heart ME: Hm. NURSE: Your resume said you were a surgeon ME: My resume says a lot of things"

"Did you hear about the mathematician who became a monk? One evening he was solving a trigonometric equation and then he saw a sine."