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Joke of the Day

"Just watched Jersey Shore for 5 minutes and now I realize why we have to do things like write ""do not eat"" on dry silica packets"

"Why do hipsters always burn their mouth when they eat? BECAUSE THEY WANTED TO EAT BEFORE IT WAS COOL!"

"Marriage Tip: Try not to leave a footprint on your spouse's ass as they get out of the car when you drop them at the airport."

"A termite walks into a bar... And asks, ""is the bartender here?"""

"If anyone tried to steal my identity I would just think ""now it's their problem."""

"What do you get if you cross a joke with a rhetorical question? ..."

"Watching a documentary is the leading cause of being unbearable in conversations for a week."

"Do you know what a gay snake sounds like? Tthhhhhhh"

"How do you turn a fox into a cow? You marry her."

"To all my American friends: Happy hunger games... May the odds be ever in your favor."