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Joke of the Day
"I hate how funerals are always at 9 or 10 am. I'm not that much of a mourning person."
Next Joke
"What do you call a snake who works for the governement ? A civil serpent !"
"A hug is basically a mini hostage situation."
"How do you tell a bad joke from a good joke? You skip the punchline."
"What's the difference between a chickpea and lintel? I've never had a lintel on my chest."
"If you don't consider yourself a terrible person, you're likely a horrific person."
"I don't mind comic sans. It's honestly a very well rounded font."
"Whoever speaks at my funeral will probably just look over at my casket and say ""well, she was always kind of like this."""
"Whew. Thank you, warning label. I was actually considering using my new floor lamp in the shower."
"Just recorded the baby crying so I can play it back to him while he tries to sleep later to see how he likes it..."