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Joke of the Day

"How did Jack know exactly where to find the goose in the giant's castle? He had *bean stalking* her."

"they smoked a joint and overthrew the government. now that's a high coup"

"""Ramen"". - Scooby Doo, finishing a prayer"

"What do you call a hired investigator who's a jerk only when he's alone? A private dick."

"What do you call a German with no good inside? Guten free."

"Me: I hope you pee your pants, teach you not to hold it in! My daughter: You shouldn't wish for that..you're the one that does the laundry!"

"Why did the blonde girl get fired from the M&M factory? She kept throwing away all the W's."

"Finn is not your average stormtrooper... ...because he doesn't know about either killing or white suits. But he does know how to install a toilet main."

"I almost lost my hearing in an accident... It was a near-deaf experience."

"alright. if everything happens for a reason why did i put a scarecrow in the shower"