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Joke of the Day
"Last night I dreamt I ate a giant marshmallow. When I woke up my pillow was gone !"
Next Joke
"A recent study has found that women who are overweight live longer than the men who mention it."
"You got problems with parenting... You start to get headaches. I follow the instructions on the aspirin bottle: ""Take two and keep away from children."""
"What's black and married to my daughter? Nothing because I'm a good parent."
"EA Games and Ubisoft walk into a bar... Act now and for just $49.99 you too can experience the intensity and originality of this punchline!"
"Hideous monsters for sale! Selling cheap! Crazy wild beasts! Won't last long! ""Honey, stop trying to sell the kids."""
"No I LITERALLY want to butter your hot cherry muffin. A euphe-what? Listen to Miss Community College over there."
"Me: Sorry I got drunk and ate all the bacon. Wife: You ate Beggin' Strips. *me to the dog* Sorry I got drunk and ate all of your bacon."
"If someone asks you what time it is they either: want to sleep with you; or are some kind of psycho that doesn't have a cellphone."
"Why are there so many Chinese people? Because as soon as you fuck a Chinese girl, you're horny again half an hour later."