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Joke of the Day
"And the award for best neckwear goes to... huh, well would you look at that. It was a tie"
Next Joke
"I need your best pickup lines I'm going to be in a contest where one section is about giving your best pickup lines. Do you have any good ones?"
"McDonald's serves up 1 billion ""abortions on toast"" They've sold 1 billion of [these](http://i.imgur.com/d9CDgON.jpg)...the egg-mcmuffin"
"What do you tell someone who feels that life has shorted them from a purpose or calling? You belong."
"What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already had to tell her twice."
"Lonely Second Graders What do you call a second grader with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor"
"I got a job with the Postal Service So I could tell people I'm a mail escort."
"Mirror Mirror on the Wall... What is my focal point?"
"Know what they call the useless skin around a vagina? A woman."
"Where can you go on Reddit to ask questions? Not /r/movies."