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Joke of the Day

"How did the Endorian get to school every day? Ewok'd."

"Men are like prisms All that matters is length, width, and height."

"I told my kids to follow their hopes and dreams, as long as their hopes and dreams lead them out of my house when they're 21."

"What song did Scar sing when he fixed his car horn? Beep repaired..."

"If I ever start a team, I'm going to name it ""Each Other Off""...That way when we loose a game, the other players will have to tell people they ""beat each other off last night""!!!"

"Why should you never make fun of a fat girl with a lisp? Because she's probably thick and tired of it!"

"What's the difference between mass and weight? Mass is where Catholics go on Sunday, and weight is where sundaes go on Catholics. (From a poster on the ceiling in my dentists office)"

"If I win Powerball, I'm having at least six of you killed. Four of you know who you are. I think the other two will be very surprised."

"So a bunch of women were playing basketball"

"I'm really good at managing my credit card. My bank keeps sending me letters saying my account is outstanding."