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Joke of the Day

"I had Taco Bell for lunch AND dinner. So yes. I've given up on life."

"Why couldn't the skeleton cross the road? Because the didn't have the guts to do it."

"Tried to catch Sirrus and Achenar yesterday Myst :)"

"*Pulls away from kissing* *Puts on headset* ""Hello 911, what's your emergency?"""

"Did you hear about the vegan what converted their car to run run on herbs? They wanted to thyme travel!"

"I was in a bar with my wife, and a girl tried to pick us up. She succeeded, but almost immediately we were back on the floor. We like it there."

"What does a gay guy say when he can't remember? I faggot"

"""susan. SUSAN IT'S WORKING GET IN HERE"" -Moses practicing parting the water in the bathtub"

"Rules to learning English: their our know rules"

"Why are you laughing? My dentist just pulled one of my teeth out. I don't see much to laugh about in that. But it was the wrong one!"