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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a body in a morgue which hasn't been viewed by anyone yet? Remains to be seen."
Next Joke
"Just goes to show, you're never to old to try new things. My nan starting running when she was 65, she's 71 now and we've no idea where she is."
"Love is that really warm feeling that starts from the tips of your fingers and goes towards the bottom of your hand. Oh no wait that's glove"
"What is the difference between Scotland and a pregnant woman? A pregnant woman is in Labour"
"Coffee: you haven't had enough until you can thread a sewing machine needle while it's running."
"Ever see the same type of towel you own at a friend's house and be like motherfucker stole my towel but really you're just drunk at an Arbys"
"Knock knock...... Who's there? One Two. One Two Who? THAT'S ONE TO MANY QUESTIONS OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR"
"I'm not racist, my shadow is black. "
"You know you're an Alcoholic when you can't even say the word ""sober"" without making air quotes"
"How good are Tesco's meatballs? They're the dog's bollocks!"